BBW

I've had a break through in self love.  Yesterday, we went to the park, so I could take some photos for my Hearth Fox Oracle website, including the dreaded headshots!  I had planned the shots out and handed the camera to my husband who...wasn't that bad as a photographer.  Surprise, surprise!  There were a couple of shots that liked on the small screen of my DSLR, although I was a little disappointed that he chose to deviate from the plan of not photographing below my boob line. 

When I got home, I uploaded the photos into Lightroom and got to work.  Surprise, surprise I liked most of the photos, too!  Some were too dark or blown out, so I nixed them, then I came to this photo:

At first I wanted to slim myself down (I do know how to do that, although I don't offer that to my clients.  Only doing so for exercises and editing practice.).  I looked at the photo for a bit, then decided, "You know what?  Fuck it.  That's me.  Big Beautiful Woman!"

A major breakthrough. 

I've always said that I'm behind the camera for a reason, because I hated seeing myself in photos, much less anything like this--portraits of myself.  With the businesses, especially the photography one, revealing myself is kind of important, so the clients know what I look like, who to meet for sessions.

People see me anyway, on my best and worse days, why hide from the camera?

I'm kind of glad that he didn't follow my instructions.  For years I've been wanting to see myself through his eyes.  He loves all of me, not just breasts up.

This self love is a strange beast, ain't it?

I'm going to be taking out my Womanrunes and Affirmation deck regarding this new stage of my healing.

What do I need to know about my self love journey?
"Celebrate"
The Sisters - Friendship "with self is growing"
The Flame - Energy, Vitality.  Enthusiasm.  "Live"
The Crowned Heart - Compassion.  "Achievement"

Affirmation Deck:
I radiate beauty.  You exude divinity.  Know that always.